Recent kwiples

Friday 23rd of August 2019 Available without prescription™ © 2015
Dead-in-the-heads say If he was smart, he would've put his name on it. You've got to put your name on stuff or no one remembers you. Donald Trump, on learning that George Washington was the real estate developer responsible for Mount Vernon  © 2019
Gun violence It's at least $10 to get a dog license in Jersey City. It's still $2 to get a permit to purchase a firearm in New Jersey. Philip D. Murphy, Governor of New Jersey, April 21, 2021 © 2019
Impeachment But if – and this is an if – if for the next year, year-and-a-half, going right into the heart of the election, all that the Congress is talking about is impeaching Trump and Trump, Trump, Trump, and Mueller, Mueller, Mueller, and we're not talking about health care, we're not talking about raising the minimum wage to a living wage, we're not taling about combatting climate change, we're not talking about sexism and racism and homo- phobia, and all the issues that concern ordinary Americans, what I worry about is that works to Trump's advantage. Bernie Sanders, CNN Town Hall Manchester, New Hampshire, April 22, 2019 © 2019
Impeachment [I]f US President Donald Trump is not brought down for his alleged wrongdoing, it will not be because his inquisitor, Robert Mueller, lacked thoroughness or because his political enemy, the Democratic party, lacked nerve. It is because not quite enough voters minded quite enough. If they did, the pressure would tell on Democrats to seek his impeachment and on Republicans to at least consider voting for it, on pain of electoral rout. Janan Ganesh, Financial Times, April 24, 2019 © 2019
Impeachment There is no political inconvenience exception to the United States Constitution. … If there's going to be accountability, that accountability has to come from Congress. … If there are people in the House or the Senate who want to say that's what a president can do when the president is being investigated for his own wrongdoings or when a foreign government attacks our country, then they should have to take that vote and live with it for the rest of their lives. Elizabeth Warren, CNN Democratic Presidential Town Hall, Manchester, New Hampshire, April 22, 2019 © 2019
Income inequality CEOs in general are paid far too much … Jesus Christ himself isn't worth 500 times his median worker's pay. Abigail Disney © 2019
Kwiplers say Count votes in Congress by: 1. Calculating a Member's Proportional Vote (MPV) for each member, as follows: MPV = SPNP / NLRS where: SPNP = State's Percentage of the National Population NLRS = Number of Legislators Representing the State (in that legislature) 2. Totaling “yes” MPVs and “no” MPVs 3. Passing if total MPV is more than 50 OTHERWISE Abolish the Senate © 2019
Kwiplers say Enhance America's infrastructure (1) without privatizing it (2) without giving tax breaks and windfall profits to private investors (3) without issuing government bonds, which increases government debt and income inequality resulting from paying interest to bondholders by (1) contracting to build or improve assets of long-lasting public value, like roads, schools, parks, housing (2) printing money and paying for work as it's done © 2017
Middle class Far be it from me to deny their value and importance, but a cell phone does not a middle class make. If one lives in a shack, in insalubrious conditions, with a volatile income that is barely above subsistence, and is unable to send his kids to school or offer to his family decent health care, it makes no sense to classify him as part of some imaginary “global middle class” because he can dial a cell phone. Branko Milanovic, The Haves and the Have Nots © 2019
Money If your ears are stuffed with money, it's hard to hear. Elizabeth Warren, CNN Democratic Presidential Town Hall, Manchester, New Hampshire, April 22, 2019 © 2019
Obstruction of justice If we had confidence after a thorough investigation of the facts that the President clearly did not commit obstruction of justice, we would so state. Based on the facts and the applicable legal standards, we are unable to reach that judgment. Mueller Report, Volume II © 2019
Post-2018 Senate shituation 15 states (Alaska, Arkansas, Idaho, Iowa, Kansas, Kentucky, Louisiana, Mississippi, Nebraska, North Dakota, Oklahoma, South Carolina, South Dakota, Utah, Wyoming) 2018 population: 40,056,961 Senators: 30 Republicans 1 Senator per 1,335,232 people 1 state (California) 2018 population: 39,776,830 Senators: 2 Democrats 1 Senator per 19,888,415 people 19,888,415 / 1,335,232 = 16, therefore: average 15er's vote is worth 16 times a Californian's, a Californian's vote is worth 6% of an average 15er's 1 state (Wyoming) 2018 population = 573,720, therefore: 1 Senator per 286,860 Wyomians, a Wyomian's vote is worth 69 times a Californian's, a Californian's vote is worth 1.4% of a Wyomian's © 2016
Poverty Everyone is happy talking about eliminating poverty, because this looks like an admirable and ethical response to the problems of inequality, while leaving the structures of power untouched. David Kynaston © 2019
Selfie I buy expensive suits – they just look cheap on me. Warren Buffett © 2019
Selfie I don't want people to throw tomatoes at me when I think I deserve a bouquet, and I don't want a bouquet when tomatoes are called for. Warren Buffett © 2019
Selfie I would like to have a saner life. I just don't know how. Marie Colvin, war correspondent  © 2018
Selfie I never had a lawyer who took notes. Donald Trump © 2019
Snapshot I always knew, you know, who he was and what he was and so on, but it didn't really matter because it's – he's a small microcosm of New York real estate. Donald Trump portrayed by Michael Cohen, who added that it's a “very different” matter to accept that behavior in a president © 2019
Southern border wall We have a crisis – but it isn't at the border. It's in the places immigrants are fleeing from. The U.S. has a long history of intervention in Latin America – military coups, unfair trade agreements, exploitation of workers and resources by U.S. corporations. Reyna Grande © 2019
Trumpists say The atrocities in America are equal to or worse to the atrocities in Saudi Arabia. Tom Barrack, major fundraiser for Trump and Presidential Inaugural Committee chairman, commenting on the chopping up of journalist Jamal Khashoggi ordered by Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman © 2019
Trumpists say By reversing the previous administration's steps to ban one of the most widely used pesticides in the world, we are returning to using sound science in decision-making – rather than predetermined results. Scot Pruitt, on reversing the ban on chlorpyrifos, a pesticide linked to neurodevelopmental problems in children © 2019
Trumpists say The Mueller Report  TRUMP CLEAN No crimes committed Dem hoax destroyed front-page headline, New York Post, Friday, April 19, 2019 [The New York Post is owned by Rupert Murdoch's News Corporoation, owner of Fox News, which broadcast the page to a much wider audience] © 2019
Trumpists say There's nothing wrong with taking information from Russians. They shouldn't have stolen it, but the American people were just given more information. Rudy Giuliani © 2019
Trumpists say [Trump] is highly biblical, and I would say to your listeners, we will in all likelihood never see a more godly, biblical president again in our lifetime. So we need to be not only praying for him, we need to support him, in my opinion, in every possible way that we can. Michele Bachmann, on “Understanding These Times,” a conservative Christian radio show © 2019
Trumpists say You look at what Russia did – you know, buying some Facebook ads to try to sow dissent and do it – and it's a terrible thing. But I think the investigations, and all of the speculation that's happened for the last two years, has had a much harsher impact on our democracy than a couple of Facebook ads. Jared Kushner © 2019
Voting rights [T]he right to vote is inherent to our democracy. Yes, even for terrible people, because once you start chipping away and say, well, that guy committed a terrible crime – not going to let him vote – or that person did that – not going to let that person vote – you're running down a slippery slope. So I believe that people commit crimes, they pay the price. When they get out of jail, they certainly should have the right to vote. But I do believe even if they are in jail, they are paying their price to society, but that should not take away their inherent American right to participate in our democracy. Bernie Sanders © 2019
Work In the new work culture, enduring or even merely liking one's job is not enough. Workers should love  what they do, and then promote that on social media, thus fusing their identities to that of their employers. Why else would LinkedIn build its own version of Snapchat Stories? This is toil glamour and it is going mainstream. … Workplace indifference just doesn't have a socially acceptable hashtag. Erin Griffith, New York Times, January 26, 2019 © 2019