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Anthony Jeselnik

Sunday 25th of October 2026

Child support I've got a kid in Africa that I feed, that I clothe, that I school, that I inoculate for 75 cents a day. Which is practically nothing compared to what it cost to send him there. Anthony Jeselnik © 2015 Kwiple.com
Nonbelievers My girlfriend has got like the greatest story behind why she's not religious any more. When she was a kid, like 12 years old, her parents nailed a 25-pound crucifix to the wall right above her bed. About two week later, in the middle of the night, the crucifix falls off the wall and leaves a 2-inch gash in the back of her dad's head. Anthony Jeselnik © 2015 Kwiple.com
 
Selfie I'm not a religious person. I would call myself an atheist. I don't have a good story behind it. I'm just reasonable. Anthony Jeselnik © 2015 Kwiple.com